Our Tripawd Experiences

Sadly, on the evening of Monday, September 22nd around 8:45 pm Mountain Time we said goodbye to Sebastian with the help of a local emergency clinic.  I arrived home from work after days of watching his breathing abilities continue to decrease and simply knew it was time to say goodbye.  He was wheezing (with a whistle sound on his inhalations) and his cough was persisting.  His gums and tongue were turning pale, which as I understand it, is indicative of a lack of necessary oxygen.  He would still get up when we motivated him to do so and was able to get outside to do his “business,” but it had become clear that he was not getting much enjoyment out of life anymore as he was more or less just laying on the floor in whatever room he happened to plop down in and was continually struggling to breathe.  The decision making process was difficult, but ultimately my husband and I agreed that the time had come.  I called ahead to the emergency clinic to say we were coming as I wanted to avoid being there any longer than necessary.  They were very kind and accommodating and had prepared a room for us by the time we arrived.  Thankfully, I had close to a week since the confirmed diagnosis of mets into the lungs to give Sebastian extra cuddles, love, and delicious snacks (pizza, ham sandwiches, granola bars, sweets, etc.)  I spent a fair amount of time laying with him, petting him and constantly reminding him what a good boy he had always been and that he’d always been an outstanding friend to me.  As the time came, I tried to stay strong for him, knowing he was in tune with my emotions and also knowing that I didn’t want him to be any more scared than necessary.  I laid on the floor with him in the clinic, pet him nonstop and thanked him for all the joy he’d brought me.  He didn’t seem frightened at all and peacefully departed to his next destination without the “scary” stuff that sometimes comes with euthanasia.

Monday night, and all of  yesterday, were very difficult for me emotionally.  I chose to go to work yesterday in order to keep my normal routine in place, believing that it’d help keep me focused on something other than my sadness.  I made it through the day, ran some errands after work and went to bed very early after the terribly emotional evening I had on Monday.  I slept through the night and woke up this morning to help Brody (our other handsome black and white blue-eyed Husky) celebrate his 11th birthday.  I’m working hard on moving forward from grieving over the loss of Sebastian into celebrating the good times we shared together and also repeatedly reminding myself that 12-1/2 years (yesterday would’ve been his 1/2 birthday) is a good life for a 70+ pound purebred Husky who had a variety of health issues throughout the course of his whole life.

I have yet to question whether amputation was the right thing to do.  If faced with the same decision again tomorrow, I would handle it exactly the same way without hesitation (with the exception of potentially doing sooner than we did.)  The amputation brought us a few more months together and I truly believe he adapted quickly and without any issues.  Had the blasted cancer not metastasized into his lungs, he’d still be with us today, but given the mets, humanely saying goodbye was the best “favor” I could give my boy at that point.  I miss his charm already and will always cherish the time we spent together.

Godspeed, Sebastian.  Catch ya on the flip-side. <3